Getting Healthy Journey Post 4

It's been a LONG time since I've blogged. I didn't understand why I couldn't get anything out. But after today, I get it. So, here we go.

I have said while losing weight I will blog about what is revealed to me that I need to work on. So the past few weeks there have been incidents that have revealed how big of an affect my selfishness and unwillingness to change has on others, not just me. For so long, I would hide my emotions of being upset or pissed off about something. If someone made me upset or did something I didn't care for or change something in a way I didn't like, I would act as though everything was ok. But once I got home, I would let out how I felt or I would be quiet and think about what happened. For a while I've been asking God to show me myself. I've asked Him to let me know what I need to work on. Well, some things have happened lately and it was things I didn't like or wasn't fond of. So as a result, my emotions of being pissed have been exuding from me and affecting others. In response to me letting someone know that I'm still trying to process things, I was told that I need to let it go. That I need to move passed what's happened or changed. But my question to that is, how do you honestly let something go or get passed something?

Honestly, at first I was thinking people knew me as this nice, sweet, cool with everything person. So, I felt that everyone expected me to be that way ALL the time. Why can't I have my moment while at home? Why couldn't I have a day of being pissed? Why couldn't I have a day of being in my emotions? I was tired of putting on a smile for everyone. I was tired of feeling as though no one treated me as I treated them. But during church, it really hit me. I'M THE ONE WITH THE PROBLEM. This was God showing me....ME! I'm still working on MASTERING MY EMOTIONS. I have an issue and I have to stay prayerful with this.

In one of my posts, I talked about not looking IN the mirror. That I was just looking AT the mirror. I realized this not only is something needed naturally, but spiritually as well. I have realized that I have been looking AT certain areas of my spiritual life but I haven't looked IN the mirror. And since I haven't been looking IN the mirror, God had to put this issue IN my face. So now I have no choice but to deal with it now that it has been brought to my attention. I KNOW this will be a process. But I'm willing and ready to deal with this head on.

So, now to my weight loss. Within the past few weeks, I have gained 1 pound, lost that 1 pound, lost .2 of a pound, and this week I lost 1 pound. I'm still moving forward with this losing weight. It has been a struggle but I'm willing to continue. Although I have been losing weight, I haven't kept up with my exercising nor sleeping well like I used to. So this week I will be changing some things in my daily regimen in order to do better with both my weight loss and spiritual life.

I hope this blog helps someone who reads it. If you have any questions and/or comments, email me at jay.robin10@gmail.com or leave your questions/comments in the comment area.

Getting Healthy Journey Post 3

This post is being written and posted A LOT later than I anticipated. But here we go...

I went to my weight watchers meeting Saturday and became devastated. I got on the scale and the check-in lady told me that I had GAINED a pound. I was devastated because I was thinking, although a couple of days I went over my points (due to traveling and being busy), I worked out 4 of 7 days this week. Where did I go wrong? How did I gain a pound? I was so sad, mad, hurt, confused, etc., that I didn't know if I wanted to continue. So much was going through my mind in that split second that I didn't hear the next thing she said to me. After snapping out of it, I asked her to repeat herself. She said, "You've made it through 4 weeks, would you like to be recognized for that?" I said yes not totally grasping what was said. I found a seat for the meeting. Sat there and waited for the meeting to start. The meeting began with recognizing people for different things. Different people lost 5 pounds or more. I was thinking, " Should I keep going?" Then I heard my name. "Jaymi Robinson? Did she stay for the meeting?" I raised my hand. The meeting leader said, "Let's give Jaymi a hand! She has made it through 4 weeks of weight watchers!" I smiled and received the charm key chain that she handed me. But as I stated in Getting Healthy Journey Post 1, I'm working on mastering my emotions. And honestly, I was ALL up in my emotions. I was still in shock that I had GAINED weight. After the meeting, I went home and stayed there for a while. I eventually moved on (to an extent emotionally) and kept tracking my points but didn't care if or how many points I went over.

The day before I was talking to my pastor and while we were talking, something was pointed out to me. "There is power in your choice". This helped me to realize that even though things may not be the way I want them to be, the greatness comes in the choice I KNOW I should or need to make. As the Word of God says, "...the Holy Spirit will bring things back to your remembrance...." (paraphrased...scripture is John 14:26). Although it was later that week, God reminded me of the conversation my pastor and I had. And that's when I changed my mindset. So what....I gained a pound. But with making a choice, I had made it through 4 WEEKS!!! Yes, continuously making the choice and conscious effort to track what I eat/ate, exercising, and simply...not giving up is what has gotten me to this point. So, have I exercised like I did last week? NO. But I'm glad to say, I have stopped emotionally eating (naturally and spiritually) because of gaining 1 pound.

I hope that as you read this post, that you realize that though you may not be in a place where you want to be...don't give up. Try to look at the positive in your life because of the choice(s) you've made. Believe it or not, your choices are the reason you are at the point you are in your life. Although there are things that happen to us that we have no control over, the thing that matters is, HOW WILL YOU REACT TO IT? WHAT CHOICE WILL YOU MAKE?

Remember to read, share, and comment. Email me if you have any questions or want me to explain something more.... jay.robin10@gmail.com

Thanks for reading☺

Mr. and Mrs. Robinson

So...last weekend (May 3) I was able to witness the ceremony of my brother, Corey, and his wife, Brittiny. They have been married since November but decided to have their ceremony May 3. The wedding was so beautiful. There is so much I want to say about these 2 people that I'm not sure how long this blog will be....so fair warning...THIS WILL LIKELY BE A LONG BLOG!!!

So....here's some background......

Corey L. Robinson. He's my brother! We are 5 or 6 years apart. The first memory I have of my brother is us going to the hospital, naming him, and feeding him. I was so excited because I became a big sister that day, December 8th. Can't remember the year. Throughout the years, we have gotten along, fought and argued. But what's ALWAYS been present has been LOVE. Witnessing my brother say his vows and "I do" to his wife was the most amazing moment ever! At that moment I realized that my little brother had grown up, for real! A lot of times we want to keep people a certain age. We want to continue remembering how someone was years ago. But at that moment I couldn't fight the fact that....my brother had become a wonderful man of God. I don't talk to him much because of the distance. Corey, I want you to know I am so proud of you. You are going on with life. You are moving forward. Continue to do so. Continue to follow God in EVERYTHING you do. Be obedient to Him. Keep God first.

The better half of this union is, Brittiny Brown Robinson. So, one day I was told my brother had a girlfriend. My mind began going 100 miles a second. I was wondering... Who is she? What does she do? Is she in school? Does she have a job? Is she lazy? Will I like her? Is she the one for my brother? Yeah...just like a big sister would wonder...right? At the beginning of their relationship, I didn't come around much. I honestly can't remember why but it definitely had nothing to do with her. As time went on, I would at times go to my mom's a day or two over the weekend or something. At times, Brittiny would be there. We had a few interactions. She seemed cool. But what I could notice from what I observed is that she is intelligent, strong, caring, observant, faith-filled, prayerful, and most importantly a woman of God. As the time has went on, we have exchanged numbers and had many, many conversations. Everything I observed of her is true. But now I can add friend, confidant, sister, and wonderful mate for my brother. Brittiny, I want to say thanks for our conversations. You are great, powerful, and very capable. Stay encouraged. Continue praying and following Christ.

So....the wedding.....

First question, who knew Ohio had a city named Louisville?? I didn't until I got the invitation to the wedding. Second question, a wedding on a farm??? Lord, what will this look like??? Will cows and chickens be roaming around? A farm? But to my surprise....this venue was the most beautiful place!! Everything was beautiful from the weather to decorations. Seeing my brother stand in the front waiting for his wife was amazing to see. I smile every time I think about it. That's when I noticed he was a grown up. Then the wedding party came in. It was a mixture of their lives coming together. And then it was time for Brittiny to walk down the aisle. She did something I've never seen before but was so beautiful. She had 4 women, who I assume, are spiritual mothers and/or sisters to her. They walked her halfway down the aisle. Then her dad met her once they stopped and walked her down the rest of the aisle. They said "I do" and vows. And the greatest line of the night and I quote, "By the authority vested in me as a minister of this state and your pastor, I pronounce you husband and wife. Now keep doing what you've been doing." Who said this? Apostle Steven L. Best. After they kissed and the wedding party walked out, it was time for pictures. Pictures were taken. Then we were able to go for the reception. OMGoodness! Talk about a barn being transformed! There was an area for the buffet food lines. We got mason jars that had handles. There was a candy bar. And the greatest...a PHOTO BOOTH!!!! They also had corn hole and giant connect 4. I didn't play any of the games but I did enjoy myself. Especially seeing the smiles on their faces!

I would like to say to Mr. and Mrs. Robinson. Follow God. Continue to pray and seek God together for your marriage. I love you both so much! Hope to visit you all again....sooner than later.

Getting Healthy Journey Post 2

So.... This has been a VERY long and busy weekend, which is why I haven't written or posted anything. My brother got married...well....had his wedding ceremony!! All info on that will come in another post.

So, I had to go to my weight watchers meeting on Friday instead of Saturday due to going out of town. It was different but I actually had fun going. We were supposed to bring in recipes to share with each other. I got so many different ideas....that I will eventually try! At this meeting I was recognized for losing at least 5 pounds since I my start date!!! I lost 4.6 pounds last week. A total of 8.2 pounds in 2 weeks!!!! It's so amazing to see and feel this transformation happening!

As I told you all, I am going to reveal things that are revealed to me as I go through this journey. Something I realized this past week is that, it's okay to do things by myself! Yes, I said it. It's okay to have fun and explore alone. When I think about MY perspective of my life, I remember ALWAYS trying to "fit in" with everyone. I felt like a loner during most of my life, whether childhood or adult. I could never seem to be cool enough to really be in the "in" crowd. I was a likeable person. But was never really invited to things with those who I considered my "friends" at that time. This was those from school and church.

I realized that I've always tried to "act" like others or do what others would do. I would try to not be me so much that now I'm grown and have NO CLUE what I really like. I would do things that others liked to do to please them and keep "friends". I never thought or asked myself, "What do I want to do?".

Last week I walked the legacy trail by myself, of course not the whole trail but 2 miles. I really enjoyed it! The weather was beautiful. I had my phone and headphones to listen to music and I walked my 2 miles. I don't like to be in the wild or nature much but it was so calming, reassuring, and literally BEAUTIFUL!! Calming because the wind was blowing peacefully every now and then, the sun was shining but not too much, and everyone respected each other on the trail as people passed each other. Reassuring because I was able to view nature and how God provides for each of the animals, fields, etc. Also that I was by myself, doing something for myself, and enjoying it. And beautiful because it just....was/is.

Walking by myself was one thing I did for me and shows me that, I am loving me more and more each day. This may not seem big to others, but it's HUGE to/for me. I am single and have no children. Who else (right now) should I be pleasing or getting to know besides God? ME! Whenever the day comes that I meet the one God has for me, how will he know what I like or don't like if I don't know?

So, to sum up this blog. Get to know YOU if YOU don't know you. Whether you are single or not. Do things for YOU and sometimes it's best if you do those things ALONE. BE YOU! #LEARNINGTOLOVEME #LEARNINGTOBEME

If you have any questions and/or comments, email me at jay.robin10@gmail.com. Put BLOG READER in the subject line. Hope you enjoyed the post. Hope it helped you.